Truth be told, I am also one of those people who never took issues of mental health as a serious concern until I had my own share of it in 2019. Prior to that, each time I heard people having stress, depression and anxiety, I referred to them as “Ding Dong” people who couldn’t handle the heat.
From the time I had my own mental troubles up to this very same day, I always pay attention to people and things within and around me. Since then, I have had many talks with people around me about mental health and related issues, those affecting them and how best I can help them deal with it
My experiences were also shared by people I interacted with. For instance, there was a time when I found out that it was hard for me to sleep in the bedroom so I prefered to sleep at the TV lounge for some time until I worked my way out of it. Few people experienced the same and it was worse for some of us who were already going through other personal challenges.
Again, to people like me who shoulder the responsibility that goes beyond our own needs, but for other people as well, it has never been easy being down mentally while assuring financial survivor of those who depend on us in our families.
There are times when a voice whispers within, convincing you that death is way better than living. There is that voice which assures you that you are better off dead than struggling with sickness, financial stability and social status and even helping people who don’t appreciate your efforts and end up hurting you.
At this point, relieving yourself of this pain, shame and trouble becomes almost a non negotiable option. Some people survive this temptation, some people do not. To those who do not, may their souls rest in peace. To those who survive it, keep surviving and keep winning, you are not the only ones defeating such thoughts. A lot of other people are doing it, you can also continue to do it and help others do it.
Life has its ups and downs. There are a number of mental triggers that one is bound to experience one way or the other. Personally, through interaction with people, I have come to realize that on top debts, relationship issues such as divorce, unfaithful partners and lack of direction do affect people the most. Then we have issues of finances, social status and drugs and substance abuse.
It’s a pity that when one is going through these things, the most common solution by people always seems to be alcohol and drug abuse.
“Amwene, tangomwani basi mutayeni mkazi/mwamuna uja asakutayitseni nthawi. Tiyeni timwe mowa ndipo m’nyamata/mtsikana wabho ngati iwe sungamalire ndi nkhani za chikondi ndi munthu oti munakumana mutakula kale,” amatero anzathu potilimbitsa mtima, kuiwala kuti you were in love for a purpose and shuttering all that in an instant is not always possible.
Again, alcohol and drugs simply offer temporary relief. When they wear out, you are back to where you left everything from. At the next point, the stress, depression etc, you find it solidified, waiting to torment you harder than before. You seek more temporary relief and it keeps getting worse. When that voice which says “enough is enough, end your life” comes, you will hardly defeat it.
Friends, let us learn to pay attention to our inner thoughts, things around us as well as people we live with. I am personally convinced that Covid-19 has also left us with a mental problem that we will take time to overcome. There are unknown fears we have to deal with, daily life challenges we have to face and the bad news we have to live with.
Always try to talk to someone when you feel you are losing the mind battle to stay alive. The good thing with issues such as stress, depression and bad thoughts, they easily get defeated when you talk about them with people. As usual, the first step is always acknowledging there is a problem and that you are trying to seek solutions. You will not find it in alcohol, drugs or sex, but you will go half way the healing process the moment you open up.
They also say, “time heals,” its true. Think of the things you have defeated before and how you look back and feel very proud about yourself and how you moved on from such. I have had my on fair share of such including public firings, bearings, humiliation and you name it, but people like me try hard not let such things get us down.
Examples are many including your very own challenges that you defeated. You are your own inspiration, you did not get to this age only to give up. Dont insult the energy that you have put up to get you to this very same day. Joy comes in the morning and there is always light at the end of the tunnel.
Stay strong friends and live a healthy lifestyle, talk to someone when worried. Zikavutitsitsa, kneel down and pray, there is some great power and hope in prayer.