My previous post provoked a thought on empowering your woman and it’s currently receiving mixed reactions.
In summary, most men feel azimayi sayamika ukawachitira zabwino ndipo zikawayendera amafuna akuvetsenso kuwawa like you did not help them. Enanso ukawathandiza amadzakusiya kupita kwa ena mkukadya ndi ena ma benefits azomwe unawachitiranzo. Akutero azibambo.
Let me say, si azimayi okha akathandizidwa mkukhala pabwino amasintha mawanga, some men aliponso and I personally have some of those Sikidzi za Njala which I empowered but changed zochita atafika pena pake, however, I am always happy that anafika pomwe anafikapo with my help and that is what satisfies me, not kusadya nawo chifukwa enanso pandekha sindinasiye kudzipanga empower.
So, everyone can change, man or woman, let’s take that argument of this empowering topic because even ifenso patokha, there are those that we have also let down after they empowered us, one way or the other.
How many of you remember the teachers who taught you?
How many of you remember the nurses who treated you?
How many of you remember the people who helped you get where you are?
We are all traitors in our own rights.
Here, I would like to tell you the type of woman to empower.
The most important woman to empower is the woman you wish to spend the rest of your life with. Your girlfriend, your fiancé or wife. You should carefully consider how you want to spend your life, years from now. A life spent with an empowered person will be a life of great meaning.
We build a dream house because we want to stay in a good home when we retire. We deposit savings in form of pension because we want to live comfortably when our bones can no longer withstand the daily pressure of making money. We do all this in preparation of tomorrow, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.
You may want to think of what happens when it doesn’t work out. Well, in every investment, there is a risk. A house may catch fire. Saving may be hit with devaluation. Form 4 certificate in 1990 is not the same today, etc. However, the focus should be towards reducing your risks.
Some of the things you can do to reduce risks when you empower your woman include, marrying her and giving her children. But these are physical things and it’s no guarantee that they will stick around, there is so much that make people stay, so even the physical aspects are not good enough, but it has to fail because it has failed not because you failed.
Helping people is beyond enjoying the fruits of that empowerment. It is fulfilment that you have or had meaning in someone’s life. People have empowered wrong people before, but those wrongly empowered ended up having a great impact on other different lives.
The thought to empower should be selfless, genuine and Godly. There are also many great examples of where a woman was empowered and became a pillar of a man’s life.
When doing things, do them positively, while expecting both positive and negative results. It shouldn’t just be negative, because the other outcome is also a possibility.
Many families are struggling today because there was a time that a man had money and did not empower their woman for whatever reasons. There are also families today that are doing extremely well because the man empowered the woman. The bible pronounces a woman as your helper for a very good reason.
Take not, we are not talking about empowering side chicks, those ones will always go to the highest bidder. We are not talking of useless women who are busy in everyone’s DM asking for favours. We are not talking about a woman who would rather order to eat something their entire clan has never eaten and cannot afford just because you have taken them out. We are not talking about women who cannot differentiate lust from love or those ones who have turned TikTok into a live stripping platform.
Here is the right woman to empower. Someone who sticks with you no matter the situations, that someone you have a conversation that is mutual and not triggered by benefits. Empower a woman who shows the potential in her on her own. Empower that woman who stands with and respects you even when you are not there. Empower that woman who understands what you can and cannot afford to do for her.
Ladies and gentlemen, I rest my case.
NB: The title should read: The right woman to empower if you plan to settle with her. Woman, not Side-Chick.
8 thoughts on “The right side-chick to empower if you plan to settle down with her”
Well, quite an intriguing article.
Gilbert M Kumilamba
I love it cz you share things based on personal experiences
This is really inspiring boss
Spouse empowerment is vital than nthata za njala
In my case humanity matters most in all aspects….. On empowerment I truly support your motion we have to be careful on deciding on people to empower especially on whom we choose to spend our life with coz those ones have a higher advantage of being empowerd
I agree that empowerment must be selfless, genuine and Godly. In this case, one is not hurt when the empowered person has changed the feathers.
Have learnt something great. Keep on tipping us especially the young men planning to marry or already married.
Probably, our ladis should learn to feel contented with the efforts men are making to enhmace their capabilities..It is not an easy task
Bernard PM Kawonga
Have learned a lot from this article