On daily basis, I get messages from women with children, seeking help to support themselves and their kids.

When I ask about their Fathers, ambiri mayankho ake amakhala oti Tinasiya kuyankhulana, Safuna kuthandiza, Amafuna ndizimunyengelera, Nayenso akumvutika etc…

Let me say, raising a child is a shared responsibility. The child belongs to a Father and Mother. If it doesnt work out between the two of you, its fine, but it should not affect the kids. Problem with most women ndikukula mtima, ma ego and banking on the wrong people, ndiye mapezeka mwawatuluka abambo a mwanayo mwachipongwe.

As a result most men just choose to let go osalimbana nazo. Ndiochepa amuna amene amalimbana ndi mkazi nkhani za ana. Ambiri amangozitaya. In the end, omvutika ndi mwanayo amakhala munthu wankazi.

Now, if you can go to people’s inboxes, begging that they help you with the child, what’s stopping you from going to the right inbox? Ku inbox kwa bambo amwana. Let’s be fair, don’t use kid’s innocence to guilty trick other people. It’s not fair. Zikavuta kawasiyeni anawo kwa abambo awo akawona chochita. Osakulirana mtima pa nkhani ya ana. You punish innocent souls.

Komanso, men, let’s be responsible. A real man will never watch his kids suffer just because the woman moved on from you. If it’s your child, support the child, empower the woman to be able to take care of your kids. You lose nothing being a responsible Father. It’s actually the most beautiful thing you can do. A child has to enjoy the love from both parents.

Also, there are ways that one can still reach out and support the child without necessarily having to go through the Mother. It is important to let women be when a relationship ends, without having to demand things such sex from them in-order to help children. If the sex happens, let it happen because the two of you want it to happen but not as a condition for child support.

Let every child have a chance to be loved, supported and nurtured for a better growth.

How you will take this message is up to you, but don’t let your egos affect kids. Set that aside.